Last Updated on October 13, 2021 by Team CrazyJackz
“I need some space!”
This is the most confusing and puzzling thing one can hear from his/her partner. You may think that everything is going fine, but when your boyfriend says he needs some space, it clearly shows that your relationship needs some fixing to be done.
And.. Right after, you decided to give your man some space, hundreds of thoughts start haunting your mind. One of the most common doubts that come first in your mind is “How long should I give him space?“
So, how much time do you give someone who needs space? Is it a couple of days? Weeks? or even more? When should you contact him again? How to properly give him space for enough time (without risking a breakup)?
Let us see everything..
“How Long Should I Give Him Space?”
To be honest, there is no straightforward single point answer to this question..
The answer to this question is completely dependent on you, your man, and your relationship. Yes, how long you should give space (to your man), depends on several personal factors and circumstances around you.
However, many relationship experts strongly suggest not to contact him until he does. Thus as a general rule, you should give him space, until he himself comes back to you.
You can simply end this right on the day when he himself comes back to you, but keep a particular time frame limit of around 30 days or so. So roughly think of giving him some space for around 30 days (Of course after which you need to make some bigger decisions).
By doing so, you are giving him enough time & space to sort out things, understand the value of your relationship, and finally come back to you again. Coming back too early can make him feel more suffocated, locked, and may even think of ending the relationship in extreme cases. So, if your man said that he needs space, doesn’t get back to him until he himself comes back to you.
Space Doesn’t Mean, Going Commitment-free..
This is one of the most important thumb-rule one needs to remember while giving someone space in a relationship. You need to clearly understand that you are just giving him space, but not making him commitment-free.
In a relationship, no matter what decision you take, it should be comfortable for both you and your partner. So, if you are not willing to give him space, even though he directly expressed that he needs some, then it is a clear sign of lack of understanding in your relationship. On the other hand, it is also not at all reasonable to make you wait indefinitely while he does whatever he wants for months.
So, giving space is not going commitment-free, however, is simply satisfying the wants and needs of your partner while still staying in the relationship.
Let us see how to properly give him space, and how you need to actually stay in contact with him while giving the space he wanted.
How to Properly Give him Space? and After, How Long should you Talk to Him Again?
If you are giving your boyfriend the space he wanted, you need to remember that it is a double-edged sword. If properly done, the space you give him can increase the bond in between you and he may get even closer to you than before. On the other hand, there are chances of backfiring too as he may lose the emotional connect (with you) and thus end up losing interest in the relationship forever.
That’s why you need to properly give him space while simultaneously making sure that you are not losing him completely.
The first thing you need to do when he wants space is actually giving him the space he is craving. It is suggested not to message him for at least a couple of days, so that he can truly sort the things out and get the free time he wanted.
Of course, you may be tempted to text him or make a call, however, control yourself and get your head out of the relationship during this time. After a couple of days, try messaging him like a small “how are you” question. If he leads the conversations, be a listener, and just let him talk as much as possible. On the other hand, If he is less responsive, leave it a few more days and let him come back to you.
Fix a time-frame, like 15 days or 20 days (however not more than a month), and leave him alone without disturbing his space. Let him contact you during this time. If he is still unresponsive even after this 30-day time frame, it is better you start discussing actual matters.
Yes, you can take a step ahead, and ask him how long he is expecting to be like this, or what he is thinking about the relationship with you. You can even ask him directly if he is thinking of a breakup with you. Make sure that you talk about these important matters in a calm concerning manner, instead of being dramatic and emotional.
Another biggest aspect while giving your man space is making sure that your relationship doesn’t fall apart. So, one strategy you can follow to avoid this is by planning to check each other, at least once or twice every week. So tell your partner that you understood that he needs space and you want to give him the space he needs, but suggest that you both meet with each other every Sunday or on a weekend. Tell him, that you would be happy and feel better if you stay connected in such a manner, during this phase. This is the surest way you can avoid your relationship to fall apart, while simultaneously checking how things are progressing and how he is feeling.
How Long You Need to Give Someone Space, Depends on the Reason Behind it..
Why does he want space? What does he actually want to do if you give him space? Knowing this one thing can give you complete clarity of how you must give him space and how long to give him the space he needed.
When a man says that he needs space, it clearly means that he is unable to do a particularly important thing in his life, and he wants to do it now when he gets some space. Thus barring extreme cases like ‘he cheating on you’, or ‘he losing interest in you’, etc, in most cases, men want space just to sort out things in their lives.
So, whenever a man asks for space, try to ask or figure out why he needs space. Once you understood what his concern is, try to explain how you can give that to him and how he can achieve what he wants, even being in a relationship with you. For example, if your man wants to prepare for a new job, adjust your timings so that he gets time to complete it. If your man is going through some family issues, let him solve them and try to give your helping hand as much as possible. On the other hand, if your man wants to pursue a hobby, make sure he gets enough free time and peace of mind so that he can pursue it whenever he wants.
So, how long you should give him space? Simply, as much time as he needs to peacefully complete the things he wanted to do. So, if he is able to make those things happen while still being happy together, then he doesn’t ever need or ask for space from you. Period.
You want to give him space for now..
But just imagine, what if this technique fails and he gets even more distant.
If at all any such thing happens, this will become your scary nightmare and a deadly pre-stage of an excruciating break-up.
If you want to get your man back with a surefire strategy that has never resulted in failed (ever). If you want to get him back so strongly such that he will love you again and again forever.
Here is what to do..
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