Last Updated on April 4, 2022 by Team CrazyJackz
So you have reached a point in your marriage where you are not sure if your husband still loves you. This is the case even after he reaffirms his love to you by words; even after he tells you he loves you.
Marriage is not as easy as some people show it to be. Living with a partner tending to each other’s needs, and being each other’s support system is a lot of hard work. Often times married couples feel that they have lost the spark they had, when they initially started dating. Life becomes so mundane that the concept of romance may seem whimsical at this point.
“My husband says he loves me but I don’t feel it“
“He says he loves me but he doesn’t act like it“
“My husband says he loves me but his actions say different“
Do the above statements resemble your inner thoughts? Don’t worry, In this article, we will discuss what to do, when you feel like your husband doesn’t love you anymore, but says otherwise.
So, Can a husband love you but not be in love with you? What to do when your husband says he loves you but you don’t feel it? What does it mean when he says he loves you but he doesn’t act like it? Let us see
My Husband says he Loves me but I don’t feel it: 4 Reasons why you are feeling this way and What to do?
When we think about it, there has to be some reason for you to believe your husband doesn’t love you, after he says he does. The reason could be a solid reason or simply something you made up in your own mind. Our mind is a funny thing that has the power to make you believe in things that don’t even exist.
Anyways let’s take a look at some of the reasons that have driven you to the conclusion that he doesn’t love you anymore. Also, what to do in each scenario.
1. He is acting different
Maybe you have discovered a change in his way; maybe he doesn’t kiss you goodbye like he used to. Maybe he doesn’t share how his day went. You guys might not have sex as often, not show the same kind of affection anymore. Or he doesn’t spend as much time with you anymore.
His distant, nonchalant behavior and the lack of physical intimacy might have made you two grow apart a little. This lack of close-ness could have made you lose the sight of the man you married. You might even feel like you both have grown apart.
Therefore you don’t believe that he actually loves you when he says he does, because you believe him to be a different man than the one who loved you.
But, Why might he be acting differently?
There could be some stress he might be facing in his workplace, or stress about someone, or even stress about the future, which he might not feel good sharing with you.
Sometimes people are unable to communicate how they are feeling or why they are feeling a certain way. Which ultimately makes them act out their feelings. Sometimes some things that trigger them might seem way too petty to be communicated to you.
What to do in this situation?
You should try to analyze his behavior more. Sometimes when people are stressed about a problem they tend to overthink about it, and neglect other aspects of life.
Talking about the situation directly may not be the best, as he already doesn’t want to talk about it. Coming at him with questions may seem a bit accusatory to him. He might feel cornered.
Instead, you should try to gain his trust and make him feel comfortable. Just help him relax. After this, you may ask him if he is facing stress about something. Don’t try to pry things out of him, if he doesn’t want to talk about.
When he tells you what he is going through, reassure him of your love and support; he may really need it. It is very important to reassure each other that you are there for them. It will make him trust you more and also love you more.
2. He may be acting passive aggressive
It is not uncommon for married couples to be angry at each other. He may have some past anger towards you, something that he doesn’t feel comfortable talking about.
What to do In this situation?
If his passive aggressive behavior is showing, then it must be a big deal to him. These things have the potential to poison your relationship.
You should try to think about something that could have angered him, and then try to see his point in the situation. If you cannot come up with something that he could be mad about, confront him about his behavior. Again don’t be accusatory, but try to be gentle and calm about it. Arguments should be sorted out in a reasonable way and shouldn’t be left cold.
Listen to what he has to say, and try to understand it rather than just putting your point forward.
3. Your marriage has become mundane.
You both may at this point, be not as excited about each other as you used to be. You may care deeply about each other but you might no longer be feeling as IN LOVE with each other as you used to.
You may feel he doesn’t love you like he did. Your life might be lacking the romance factor and that might be the reason for his changed demeanor.
What to do about it?
The first step again would be to talk about it to your partner. Try to remember the things that you love about each other. Make each other feel attractive; it is known that complimenting each other makes you feel desirable and attractive. Make the effort to look attractive for each other.
Couples that feel desired in their marriage have happier marriages. Do couple activities together; they will help you guys bond.
4. You may be overthinking
It is highly possible that you don’t believe he doesn’t love you anymore because you feel unlovable at some level. Often we feel so shitty about ourselves that we feel like nobody could love us.
Therefore even if he does love you, you may not believe him. This can be a result of you not loving yourself enough. When we don’t love ourselves enough, we tend to hurt others by not believing in them when they say they love us.
What should I do about this?
You need to sit down and think why you may feel as if you don’t deserve his love. We tend to drive people away when we don’t love ourselves enough. You should focus on yourself for a bit, focus on feeling better, or what to do to feel more confident in yourself.
Sharing your insecurity with your husband might help too; he might be able to reassure his love for you.
At the end of the day you both are in the marriage together, it is important that you are able to communicate better. Communicating better is what can help you both be clear about your marriage, and why you are in it. Marriage needs a lot of effort, emotionally. Misunderstandings should not stand in your way of a happy marriage.
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