Last Updated on September 2, 2022 by Team CrazyJackz
Being cheated on by your husband is a huge iceberg in your marriage. You can either steer past it or you could let rage steer your ship directly into the iceberg. The act leaves you with a lot of anger. You may steer past the iceberg, but the act will definitely, shake your ship, shaking the stability of your relationship.
Even when you steer past the iceberg, there are chances you will reminisce the time you faced the iceberg. If you are not able to stop picturing your husband with another woman, then you are reminiscing the iceberg that almost broke your marriage.
It is not your fault that you are reminiscing the events, that could have broken your marriage. Human is a complex animal, that loves nostalgia, be it the childhood memories of you with your friends, or the childhood trauma your parents gave you.
Being cheated on leaves you with a ton of trust issues. Even if your husband has already apologized, they might just seem like words, that hold no value. As you don’t trust your husband anymore as much as you did, before they cheated on you.
You start taking doubts way too seriously now, as you think back to the time, you should have taken the doubts in consideration. When your husband is at the office, you will be constantly picturing him with someone else. Any attractive woman near him will create a cloud of doubt in your head. See This sends a SHIVER up a man’s spine if he’s seeing another woman again
Moreover, you might be constantly picturing your husband with the other woman because when someone cheats on you, it also leaves you with a lot of self doubt. It leaves you with questions like; Am I not enough? , Am I not beautiful enough? , Is my personality not good? , What did she have that I did not? Will I ever be good enough? , Do I deserve him?. These questions have the power to drive you paranoid.
You start questioning your husband’s love for you. You start questioning your love for yourself. The amount of self doubt might even push you towards becoming a people pleaser.
Picturing your husband with someone other than you might be a product of all the insecurities, lack of trust, and lack of stability in the relationship.
However, there are some things you could do to save yourself the trauma of imagining your husband with someone else.
So, How do you stop picturing your husband with the other woman? How do you stop imagining your partner cheating? Finally, How to get over your husband cheating?
Don’t worry, here are some things you can do to forget and stop reliving your husband’s infidelity..
How Do I Stop Picturing My Husband With The Other Woman? 5 Steps to Stop Reliving Infidelity
1. Get closure
Now, this might be the hardest part of this journey, but it is for sure the most important part. Getting closure about the affair would need you to talk to your husband about the whole affair, but maybe in a little more detail than just “I cheated on you with xyd”. Clear all your doubts. Sometimes knowing what happened clears some fog from your eyes.
Your husband might not feel comfortable talking about it to you, but you gotta assure him that it will be ok. Talk about the affair, (about how he felt during the affair. When did he feel guilty, etc) it will get you a bigger clearer picture of things.
Now you may wonder, how getting a clearer picture of their affair is going to help you not picture your husband with another woman. Here is the answer, it will help you get over the imaginary image running in your mind. Many times you keep imagining just because you don’t have a clear picture. Thus hearing and knowing about every detail, will help you clear it out of your system.
Closure can help you evaluate your feelings towards the affair as well. As you will be able to hear about the affair with a clear mind. See Why men cheat “perfect” women: what EVERY woman needs to know
2. Take a little time off
Try spending time with your friends, as it will make you feel yourself again. Do things you enjoy, like running, bubble baths, shopping etc. These things will help you divert your mind from unnecessary thoughts. It will help you to be happy.
Also, do things that will help you boost your confidence. Focus on yourself and boost yourself; it will help you clear all the self-doubt you have.
3. Make sure the mistress is no longer in your husband’s life
It might sound excessive to some people, but it will give you an immense amount of relief knowing the mistress is no longer near him. Even if he is no longer hiding the past affair, it is important that all connections to the mistress are cut.
If the mistress is in the same workplace, as your husband. Make sure to make it clear to him that, the next time he cheats on you, you will be no longer in the picture. Demand absolute transparency from him.
4. Think about why you both are still together
Think about how your husband is with you, trying to mend this marriage even though he knows that it will be difficult. Think about how your husband is willing to be honest with you now. Your marriage must hold a lot of meaning to him, for him to try and work on your marriage.
Think about how much your husband must love you, to come back to you, after being with another woman. He knows he may not be able to build that trust back again, but he is trying to keep you with him.
Try doing activities together, like going on a vacation. This will help you bond and enjoy each other’s presence.
5. Have clear concepts
You are not the reason your husband cheated on you. You are not to be blamed for not holding on to your husband tight enough. He is your husband, not a parrot, who you need to keep in a cage. You are not responsible for his actions, he is.
When you stop blaming yourself, your appearance, and your personality, for your husband cheating on you, then you will be able to move on from it easily.
Couples therapy might also be a great option, in such a situation.
You should know that you have steered clear of the iceberg in your relationship. It tested your ship and it only shook once. You should try to trust the ship more and be a little less paranoid while keeping an eye out for other icebergs.
Attention:
You both used to be a happy couple in the beginning.
Now tables have completely turned around. You can’t deny the fact that He has literally chosen another woman even though you are beside him.
In fact, Cheating is clearly a warning sign that your man is getting attracted to new women around him. And more scarily, there are strong chances that this may happen again and again.
But..Now
If you want to make him strongly obsessed with you such that he won’t even look at other women. If you want to save your relationship such that you both will be deeply in love again forever.
Here is what to do..
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